Category Archives: conservativism

Truth and a Mall Santa Claus

A street preacher, already notorious in Amarillo, Texas, disrupted a shopping mall’s Santa visitation with children recently, loudly announcing to them, “Santa Claus is not real.” There is no doubt he was very sincere in what he was doing; for, yes, Santa Claus is not “real” but that does not mean his tradition in our country is not valid for little children. But he demonstrated the wisdom of the bumper sticker I’ve been obsessed with recently, “Don’t believe everything you think.”

This gentleman believes he has the “truth” and that the “truth” most boldly proclaimed because hapless parents lack the spiritual depth he has or they would not subject their innocent children to this falsity. And this illustrates the dilemma of “truth” and the danger that occurs when one is “filled with the spirit” and knows that he has the truth exclusively. As admitted in the past, I write from experience and now realize just how arrogant I was, now seeing Truth as much more subtle part of a mystical dimension of human experience which we can never own. But, oh is it tempting to think that we do!

I readily admit that I feel I am writing “truth” when I discourse here but have no illusion that it is axiomatic, written in stone, sent from on “high” Truth. I have only a simple perspective, shaped by my biological and social past and for some unknown reason I am moved to “hold forth” in this venue, taking comfort in the knowledge that no one is being coerced to pay any attention. And oh so many don’t!

The street preacher’s “truth-proclaiming” belied the certainty that consumes him about his beliefs and that certainty is now consuming American culture, especially the conservative element. The braggadocio of Donald Trump and his promise to “Make America Great Again” appealed to a segment of the population who pines foe the days when life was more certain. Furthermore, Trump’s rhetoric appealed to fundamentalist Christians who readily looked past his moral depravity in the hope that the “certainty” of their faith could be reassured. Certainty is so much easier than faith.

But the certainty I’m exploring here belies a profound lack of certainty, a deep existential doubt that must be assuaged by addictively clinging to some dogma, even “dogma” that I have found to have great value once I had the courage to see the role my ego was playing in my immature and dogmatic faith. When one is existentially insecure, he must find something to latch on to in order to alleviate the emotional, spiritual duress he would otherwise feel.

(See story about Mall Santa verbal attack, http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2016/12/13/preacher-children-santa-claus-does-not-exist/95371826/)

Reason and Politics

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I’ve followed politics closely for the past 28 years or so and I’ve noticed each time that on some level I merely want “my pony to win the race.” I merely want to be on the winning side and oh how disappointing it is when “my pony”, particularly in a Presidential campaign, does not win. But in this same 28 years I’ve been increasingly conscious that the drama being played out is far greater than my youthful desire to be on the winning side and even in crushing defeats I’ve always maintained that there is some “method to this madness” or that there is a “Divinity that doeth shape our ends, rough hew them how we may.” In other words, the picture is always much bigger than I can see and the “picture” before me is always merely the latest screen shot of the historical drama that is ongoing.

I have a bevy of close friends here in Taos, NM who I see quite often and we are on the same page, being fearful of what lies before us but having firm confidence that “the process” will prevail, even if we are disappointed on this occasion. For life itself is a process, a “flow”, and it will continue even if catastrophe should come, be that a personal catastrophe and my life is suddenly snuffed out, or even if the whole species is wiped out! The picture is always bigger than the one I see or even bigger than the one that humankind sees at the moment. We are always caught up in the historical moment and have no idea of what actually is going on.

Of course, some think that they do and have firm confidence in their perspective, often vowing that God has declared it to them. To them I would merely note that when the flat earth view of the world was crumbling, most people clung tenaciously to their antiquated world view and even put to death many of those who saw things otherwise. And, of course, “God was leading them.” We have only a finite view of the world, but understanding and experiencing this finitude is so frightening that we usually disallow it from every seeping into our awareness.

No one’s reason is autonomous. We think we employ reason to draw correct conclusions but science has proven that reason is always under the control of our preconceptions so that we are inclined to see only what we want to see. W. H. Auden emphasized the need of our reasoning being, “redeemed from incestuous fixation on her own logic.” Auden recognized that our reason was subservient to an “incestuous logic” which always provides us justification for our conscious rational grasp of our world. When we are subservient only to reason, we need to recall the wisdom of Goethe who noted, “They call it Reason, using light celestial, just to outdo the beasts in being bestial.”

“The World is My Oyster” (Not)

The Ego and “Distinction Drawing”

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Fr. Richard Rohr today offered observations about the ego which are relevant to my present focus on the “distinction drawing” that is an essential part of our identity. He pointed out how the ego is concerned only about itself which is just a basic dimension of being human and only becomes toxic when it metastasizes and begins to project its shadow outside onto “them” and in extreme attempts to obliterate “them.” The best example is Isis but the same phenomena is found with any extremist group.

Ordinary ego functioning is, yes, “egotistic” but it is usually benign and helps provide group/tribal coherence. It provides an identity which always sets one apart from “them.” I shared recently about my upbringing in a conservative Landmark Baptist Church and it does provide an example of an inordinate need to “draw distinctions” and thus overly emphasized the biblical admonishment, “Come out ye from among them and be ye separate” and “Be ye a peculiar people.” I often facetiously note to friends that my little church clearly succeeded in this endeavor and, with chagrin, admit I won the prize for “peculiar”! But let me assure you that in my little central Arkansas community these people were not toxic, were very good people, and did a great job in providing me the social and educational structure that would allow me to now be able to “discourse” about them. Conservative groups, with non-toxic ego needs, are the backbone of any tribe and even of the entire world.

But when the toxicity metastasizes, we find phenomena like Isis and Westboro Baptist Church, the latter of which is a caricature of Baptist churches. In these groups the “distinction drawer” has become so powerful due to repressed fears and anxieties from the reptilian brain that there is a need to strike out at somebody. In a way they are so much under the grip of the unconsciousness that they are powerless which is how Rohr interprets Jesus’ dying words on the Cross, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do.” Jesus knew that those who hated him to the point of wanting to kill him merely were not conscious of what they were doing.

When distinction drawing becomes too rigid, when the need for boundaries becomes paramount, it always leads to an over emphasis of what sets the group apart rather seeking for common denominators with others. It is not accidental that one of the most appealing dimensions of Donald Trump is his promise to “Build that wall” to keep out the Mexicans. And it is not often remembered now but not long after he started this emphasis one of his competitors went to the absurd extreme of proposing to build a wall between our country and Canada also! Trump’s message appeals to frightened people who see their out dated certainties threatened. The message of “building a wall” is a symbol that resonates with the need to “set boundaries” and keep change from happening, not recognizing that “change” is an essential dynamic of life and must be embraced rather than opposed. Otherwise we would still be living in the Stone Age.

The Tyranny of Being Right

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One of the earliest “distinction drawings” I learned after becoming conscious was that the world was divided into two categories—“saved” and “unsaved.” And from that font of binary thinking I learned there were Baptists and then there were other religious denominations who did not understand the Bible “right.” And even worse, there were the “Mary-worshipping” Catholics and also the Jews who weren’t even Christian! And even within Baptist ranks, there were my particular brand of Baptist (Landmark Missionary Baptists) and then those “liberal” Southern Baptists from which we Landmarkers had split off from in the late 19^th century. And even within Landmark churches there would often arise doctrinal squabbles which would lead to a split and the start of another church. Note that the phenomena of needing to draw distinctions was a fundamental premise. And in my denomination, there was even the phenomena of the Bride of Christ which was an honorary place in heaven for Christians who had belonged to the church which most closely adhered to the gospel and could trace their historical roots back to Christ. Yes, I was honored to learn that this was my church. Yes, even in heaven there would be distinctions drawn. Gawd it was comforting to know that I was so special.

And please note that this “distinction drawing” was not the exclusive domain of Christianity or even fundamentalist Christianity. It is merely part of being human and is toxic only when we never mature enough to make the need of drawing distinctions less important than finding common ground. It has always been present in human history and will always be present as it is inherent in cognition itself. BUT, it is possible…I am finding…to be a thinking human being and realize that some of the distinctions I have drawn with such rigidity in my life are not quite as black and white as I had been taught. But for those who are stuck in what Richard Rohr calls “binary thinking” cannot help but obsessively seek for distinctions which leave them separate from others and thus “right.”

One result of this emphasis on my early life was the need to be right. I quickly learned that there was “right” and “wrong” and learned that “right” consisted of basically adhering to the rules that constituted “right.” I now realize that existentially, in the bowels of my young heart, I had perceived myself to be intrinsically bad but that I could be “good” and be “right” if I followed the rules, if I would be a “good little boy.” This put me on the path of being a very good hypocrite, for the word hypocrite merely means “to act.” I am not denigrating myself in the least with this point. I was only a child and had learned how to find validation and that was in “acting” right and I did so with utmost sincerity. Richard Rohr has pointed out that most of us spend the first half of our life as an actor in all respects and only then begin to wrestle with the under-lying dimension of life which always involves opening Pandora’s box in some way. But it is hard to impossible for a guilt-ridden Christian to admit they have been “acting” for doing so would be to acknowledge and embrace the feelings of “wrongness” which have always tyrannized them into outward compliance with rules. They would have to realize they have been living in bondage to “the law” albeit a “Christian” version of bondage. They have been socialized or enculturated into their faith…which is a necessary stage of faith…but at some point it is important to acknowledge the “act” they have been putting on and allow the “Spirit of the Law” to begin to flow. James Alison, who will share the stage with Richard Rohr in a couple of weeks, has written a book entitled “The Joy of Being Wrong,” describing the release he found when he no longer had to be constantly trying to be “right.” And of course, in the need to “be right” I constructed various constructs in life in which I could be “right” and “they” would be wrong. Oh, how comforting it was. And how hypocritical.

The Devil Is Out to Getcha!!!

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When I first ventured onto Facebook several years ago, I was filling out the personal info forms which included books that I had read, two of which were by Neal Donald Walsch. Shortly thereafter, someone with whom I had went to high school, posted without specific reference to me, an observation to another person I had went to school, “Neal Donald Walsch is of the devil” and his friend responded quickly with, “Yeah, straight from the pits of hell.” I immediately knew it was “Welcome to Facebook” from my old classmates, though without the courage of telling it to me directly.

But I also knew immediately, “Well, they are right! Walsch is ‘straight from the devil’ given the world they live in, the world which I somehow managed to leave decades ago.” For with Walsch and so many other authors, I had ventured into forbidden territory. For any tribe offers its young patterns of thinking and behaving from which departure is discouraged with warnings such as, “It’s of the devil.” It reminds me of the warnings ancient cartographers would emblazon on parts of the world maps to which no one had traveled, “There be the dragons.” And to venture beyond the pale prescribed by these tribal elders is to incur duress which might feel at times like “hell.”

This memory provided a flashback of my youth spent in die-hard biblical literalism of the American South and the stern admonishment that anyone who ventured to look at the Bible with an open mind was already flirting with Satan. And I also recalled how this rigidity disallowed me from questioning any Biblical, “axiomatic” truths such as that Blacks were an inferior race, that women were to be submissive to their husband even to the point of what we now call “marital rape,” and even…and here I get into the mundane…that the Southern Baptists were “unscriptural” and “liberal” and thus following the devil because they were sending their missionaries out through a “Mission Board.” (See explanatory footnote)

But, I still believe firmly in the existence….or “presence” of a “devil”…though I do not see him or “it” as I was taught. This is partly due to discovering the darkness in my own heart and accepted that I will have to wrestle with it the rest of my life. And I see this darkness throughout the world when I observe the stubborn blindness of my fellow man to disregard the spiritual dimension of life and blindingly worship our modern deities…such as consumerism…even as we convince ourselves that we are worshipping God, thinly disguised as, “Truth, justice, and ‘the American Way.” So, yes. There is a devil!

The Devil, Satan, or whatever you want to call it is always a very real presence with each of us. I have found “it” is most present when I’m most sure of myself and even more so when I’m sure of myself with spirituality. Reflecting back to my days in “certainty” I realize I had subscribed to a “willful blindness” rather than accept that I could only “see through a glass darkly.” It was easier to just keep my blinders on and shut out doubt and insecurity, scream my dogma and jargon a little more loudly when threatened than to venture into the primordial silence which the Bible describes as “the still small voice of God.”

I think the devil is most conspicuous in our need to be right. I think the surest way to locate the devil is to watch for those who are most emphatic in announcing “we are right” and they are always ready to explain why. And, knowing they are right, they usually feel that “god” is leading them to force others to believe and behave just like they do. The need “to be right” always reveals a profound internal conviction of being “wrong,” really, really wrong, intrinsically wrong. And even there in that unconscious “knowledge” a narcissistic wounding expresses itself in a kind of grandiosity. Being a mere mortal, fraught with human frailty and avarice, is not enough. They must be “intrinsically bad.”

FOOTNOTE—I was raised in a splinter group from the Southern Baptist Convention. We were so conservative that we saw the Southern Baptist as “liberal.” One of the primary expressions of the SBC’s liberalism was their “modernistic” notion of sending their missionaries out through a collective body called the “Mission Board.” My group felt that missionaries should be sent out only through the individual, “local church.” Historically, this controversy was an expression of the 19^th century rural rebellion against urbanization and the encroaching demands of modernity.

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