I share a video clip below from a young actress, Thandie Newton, who speaks at a TED conference about an identity crisis she experienced when just a girl and continuing as she became a fledgling young actress. She had the courage to find wisdom in her early twenties that I am only now trying to discover at thrice the age.
She speaks of self and separateness and uses the term “self” as I would use “ego.” She describes this self as a “vehicle to navigate a social world comprised of the projections of other people,” and noted that it is designed only to cope with the fear of death. She presents it as a false reality which left her feeling empty and alone.
She spoke of her discovery that “awareness of the reality of oneness can heal us” and described this realization as the loss of the false self, the ego self. Newton experienced what I would call “grace” as she embraced the world as she realized that it embraced her. She stopped drawing the distinction between “me and thee” that Western culture is so intoxicated with.
I want to conclude with an observation by Pema Chodron about our “shared humanity” and how that we can experience this “oneness” when we are willing to come out of the darkness that Newton was born into just as we all are:
Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity. (Pema Chödrön, The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times)
(You might have to copy and paste the following clip.)
literary lew 
am stealing this one, thank you so much…. now why did I need this today…
LikeLike
Well, you’ve stolen my heart already…so just go ahead and help yourself!!!!! Seriously, I’m pleased that you appreciate this. I was deeply touched by the young woman. (And again my Baptist guilt insists that I apologize for the feigned flirtatiousness!)
LikeLike
As to “why today?” Not for sure. But I’m glad it was timely. There is so much wisdom in her words.
LikeLike
Thank you so much, but specially for being such a gentleman Literary Lew… your blog has wisdom,brilliance, fun and such kind words from the Host ! Oh wow, in an insane world, an oasis…. thank you God… 🙂
LikeLike
You are always kind!
LikeLike
Hey Literary Lew. Thank you for your comment on my blog a couple weeks ago. I don’t get very many intellectually minded people. My readers are pulp fiction, everyday average kind of people. That’s alright as a base, but I’m a little shaken up because I like to post dense intellectually minded pieces over the straighforward stuff. I was thinking you’d be the person to turn to for a little intellectual evaluation. I posted a chapter about attraction and how to use power. It’s offended one person and I haven’t heard back from anyone else yet. I’m wondering if I missed something and its recieved in the wrong way. The chapter is called “tales of seduction: Manipulation”. If you feel up to reading about leadership and corruption, this would be the literature to turn to. It’s dense and takes some time to digest, but if you’re up for it, I could use constructive feedback. Thanks. Jo.
LikeLike
I’m very honored with your request. I’ll be glad to give you some feedback. It might take me a couple of days though.
LikeLike
No problem. I didn’t expect you’d actually do it. So anytime if ever is good. Thanks.
LikeLike
It’s perfect time to make a few plans for the longer term and it is time to be happy. I’ve learn this post and if I could I
wish to suggest you few interesting things or suggestions.
Maybe you can write subsequent articles referring to this article.
I wish to read even more issues about it!
LikeLike
Thanks. curious about who you are. Are you a spammer?
LikeLike
Thanks , I have recently been looking for information about this subject for a while and yours is the best I have found out so far.
But, what in regards to the conclusion? Are you sure concerning the supply?
LikeLike
Glad you dropped by. Not for sure what you mean about your concluding question, “Are you sure concerning the supply?” Are you a spammer?
LikeLike
Hello my family member! I want to say that
this post is amazing, great written and include almost
all vital infos. I’d like to peer extra posts like this .
LikeLike
Thanks. I appreciate you dropping by. But I’m curious about who you are. You appear to be merely a food service. Are you a spammer?
LikeLike
Hi, I do believe this is a great website. I stumbledupon it 😉
I will come back yet again since i have book-marked it.
Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to
guide other people.
LikeLike
Thank you so much, my friend. This means a lot to me.
LikeLike
Pingback: Embracing otherness, embracing myself: Thandie Newton | heartflow2013
Glad you visited and hope you come back. Thandie was awesome!
LikeLike
Pingback: To Be Aware
Glad you dropped by. Newton’s observations were compelling. So glad you liked. hope you return.
LikeLike
Thanks for dropping by. Like the name of your blog!
LikeLike
Admiring the time and effort you put into your site and in
depth information you offer. It’s good to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t the same unwanted rehashed material.
Fantastic read! I’ve saved your site and I’m adding your RSS feeds to my Google account.
LikeLike
i deeply appreciate hearing from you. thanks so much.
LikeLike
I’m so glad you dropped by and enjoyed. I will start posting again real soon.
LikeLike
I do consider all the ideas you’ve introduced for your post. They’re really convincing and
can certainly work. Nonetheless, the posts are very brief for
starters. Could you please lengthen them a little from next time?
Thank you for the post.
LikeLike
Thanks for your note. But, a question for you. Since I posted the Thandie Newton video, every response I’ve received has been spam. You appear to be legitimate. Please confirm for me that you are. Otherwise, I will “spam” you. Thanks.
LikeLike